Tuesday, July 21, 2009

I've had a wonderful time but this wasn't it.

Great day overall, though rather overwhelming. First day with both boys in the house. Quality time with both, and each one.

But now it is 4 am and I have been up since 2:30. And Tiny Guy has only been up since after 3. The Boy was throwing a fit at 10:30 and woke up 4 hours later to pick up where he left off. He left the room and was asking for things, and was screeching, and just being a little jerk. Daddy was having a time trying to calm him, and I was trying to stay asleep because my turn with Tiny Guy was coming soon. Finally I got out of bed to calm The Boy. So it's been...when The Boy is not receiving direct attention from me, he gets up out of bed and wanders. But Tiny Guy needs me too. I nursed one side twice and pumped the other, and right now Daddy is giving him a bottle. Partly for the healing but mostly so that I can stay with The Boy and keep him from wandering and throwing fits. Oh, and Tiny Guy is still not wild about the bottle.

The problem is that when we offer a bottle, we don't know how much he needs, and he generally doesn't replace full feedings with a bottle. But even the process of trying to get Tiny Guy to take a bottle is probably less stressful than toddler drama. At 4 am. Fortunately I pump more than either of them drinks right now. The Boy wanted milk, so I poured him 1.5 oz or so. He took 2 sips and changed his mind. Yes, he is drinking people milk. He is a person. But I am not thrilled about wasting milk.

So I don't yet know if Tiny Guy was satisfied with his bottle but it seems as though The Boy is asleep. No, nevermind. But he is calm. And all I hear from the living room is the TV. Once nursing becomes easy, as I know it does, I think I will have a better handle on both boys. Because Mommy is essential. In the meantime, if every night at home is like this, then we're all F-ed.

5 comments:

Sarah R said...

There are good days and theere are bad days. This was a bad day, and I hope the next several ones are good. It's hard enough dealing with a newborn, but when you add in a toddler with cancer, ay-ay-ay..... many hugs to you.

Alina said...

There won't be many nights like this, but right now The Boy needs to get accustomed to being home again, sharing his parents with a new baby brothers etc. I hope he feels better soon :) As for the nursing problem you know the drill - lanolin by the bucket, put breast milk on it and air it out - easier now than in Jan and March when I had to do it! Hugs :)

JC said...

I hope things get easier soon! You can do it though so hang in there. I know it is good to finally ALL be home!!!

The Reluctant Crunchy Mama said...

I remember feeling so overwhelmed. I can't imagine having 2! Sending you hugs. I hope the bbs get better soon! And I hope that The Boy gets used to the new family soon. He might be a bit confused. Never mind whatever discomfort he might be experiencing that he can't tell you guys about.

Sarah R said...

Is everything going well your way? It's unusual to not have a post from you or Musical Daddy in a day. Just a little worried here! Hope you're just busy.