Saturday, November 29, 2008

Problem, in the future--need advice

I will be bringing this up with the doctor when we next see him (or her, depending on which doctor is on today), but I wanted to get some feedback from my readers as well.

As you've recently learned, I will be expecting child #2 in July, and The Boy will not be anywhere close to finished with his treatments and hospital stays. As a mommy, I'm certainly going to want to be with both of my babies as much as I can be. I am wondering, though, does the hospital prohibition on smaller child visitors extend to infants? Or does it even extend to younger siblings at all?

Fortunately, when the new little one is brand-new, it will be the summertime and Musical Daddy won't be in school. He may still be doing the summer program, but that's a much shorter day. So he'll be more available at that time.

But once the end of August comes, it's marching season. And then school is back in again.

I can't see pawning the new baby off on a sitter for the better part of the day every time that The Boy is in the hospital. We can't afford it. We'll keep Ms. R. in the loop, because there may be some occasions when we'll need someone to watch one or both children, but not all the time.

Remember, also, that the new baby will be nursing, because we won't have it any other way. Certainly I pumped for The Boy, but that was during the schoolday, which was pretty short, and The Boy napped a lot with Daddy during the day. I don't have objections to pumping and feeding bottles but I don't want it to be for dumb reasons.

I guess at this point this is just a rant...but if you can offer any advice on what to do about everything, please share.


mommybird said...

I don't know for sure because of every hospital has different policies, but usually the prohibition of younger children does not apply to siblings. It would depend on what The Boy is being seen for at the time. I think many of his hospital stays, like the one he is currently in the middle of they would allow his younger brother or sister to visit him. Of course if he were ICU they do not allow babies and young children because of the higher risk of infection. It is difficult to split your time between two children especially when one has more needs than the other, but you have a lot of love to give and you will be able to make it work. Most likely you will have to split time between your husband and yourself and leave baby with him when you want to be at the hospital and the other way around of course. Pumping and feeding is definitely a perfectly acceptable way to feed the baby. I don't think that having a son in the hospital would be a stupid reason for you to pump and feed. I had to do that with both of my children for various reasons. The baby getting the breastmilk is obviously the most important part of it. I could not nurse even when I was with them, but everyone knew that if I was there when baby was hungry it was my right to be the one to feed the baby even with the bottle. I know you can make the whole thing work. I always believe babies are sent to us when they are for a reason and soon enough you'll know what that reason is.

the mol said...

I guess that what I meant by the pumping and feeding comment was that I don't want someone to say "oh, you can just pump" because it's an extra step, to have to pump in the hospital while paying attention to my older son at the same time, when having him with me means that he gets to nurse and it's not that hard to hold him with one hand and snuggle The Boy with the other.

Sarah said...

Considering you will already be careful about "germs" with The Boy, it wont be so hard protect a second from germs too. (I am mentioning this, because it might mean something to the dr.s in regards to allowing the baby to come with you).

I am with you on the pumping thing- it is a chore, and I would prefer to BF directly every single time possible. Yes, it is the milk that is important, but so is that bond.

I really hope the hospital can be accomidating for you as your hospital visits are going to be such a huge part of your routine and your whole family's life.

Mom's are so special. I really hope this situation works well for your family.